Recently, I realized I was carrying a heavy burden that I did not need to bear. A weight of sadness held me down and drained me of my energy and goodwill. This deep sadness settled over me after a long conversation with a close friend whose views differ greatly from my own.
I’ve always felt love and respect for her, so I experienced real pain and confusion as I later ruminated on her words and tried to understand her way of thinking about our country’s politics. She is convinced her views are correct, while I believe they may lead to harm. My heavy, tangled feelings overwhelmed me, as if I were being pulled down into a gloomy, sorrowful place.
It took me a few days to recognize that I could—and must—let go of this burden of sadness.
I made the decision to release these thoughts, set down my millstone, and, most importantly, to accept my friend as she is: a sister-in-Christ trying to do her best in a complicated and divided world. Just like me.
This experience made me realize I needed more joy in my life, so I decided to intentionally choose joy.
How can we all experience more joy? Here are three simple takeaways.
1. Joy is available to all of us— when we choose it.
Joy does not simply happen to us.
We have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day.
— Henri Nouwen
Experiences of poverty, war, and injustice can make the choice of joy more difficult. Yet spiritual writers like Frankel and Thurman show how meaning and even joy can be found in the midst of suffering. An excellent reflection on the difference between joy and happiness explains that joy arises from within and is not dependent external circumstances: https://www.compassion.com/blog/difference-between-joy-and-happiness/
2. Staying close to God is choosing joy.
When we choose God and remain attentive to his constant presence, we are choosing joy. This love connection is the internal source of joy—it is, indeed, an inside job.
The fullness of joy is to behold God in everything.
— Julian of Norwich
Joy is the most infallible sign of the presence of God.
— Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
3. Live joy in small, daily ways.
Let us remember to smile, laugh, accept others, avoid comparisons, and above all be grateful for the gift of each moment. In these simple practices, we will find joy and spread it to others, helping to heal our world.
"Joy is never tomorrow; it is always now.”
— Pierre Teihard de Cardin
"Joy is the net of love by which you can catch souls."
— Saint Mother Teresa
"Comparison is the thief of joy.’
— Theodore Roosevelt
With overflowing joy and gratitude, I dedicate this blog to my husband, Wilbur. His positive non-complaining attitude, his big laugh, his playful spirit—coupled with his deep faith—bring joy into my life and inspire me to grow in joyfulness.
I wish you a blessed and joyful Easter season and spring.
Donna
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Dr. Donna Chacko promotes health of body, mind, and spirit through her website (serenityandhealth.com), her blog, her podcast/vlog series, “Engaging with a Messy World” and " “Pop-Up Conversations on Health of Mind, Body, and Spirit,” and programs at her church. She is the author of Pilgrimage: A Doctor’s Healing Journey (Luminare Press, 2021), 2022 Illumination Awards Gold Medal Winner, 2022 Reader Views Literary Award Gold Medal Winner, and 2022 Catholic Media Association First Place Awards.
What I learned about choosing joy over sadness. With gratitude I dedicate this blog to my husband, Wilbur.